We meet again...

After a long absence from blogging (due to technical difficulties), I am finally back. New posts will be coming soon and I absolutely can't wait to begin writing them.


Time for nothing

I've never been so confused about the decisions and options that lie before me. I'm usually not the type of person that finds themselves in a predicament like this. I've always known exactly what I want; always known what choice would be the best one to make. I've come to a point in my life though, that I'm unsure of myself and what lies ahead. When I sought out some advice, a wise person told me that the best decision I could make was not making one at all. It makes total sense to me. Right now, I should do nothing until my confusion has lifted. Others in my life will not agree with this decision, but it's right. This is the only thing that has felt right. It may take weeks or months for the fog to roll out, but when it does... I will have my answer.


I sleep...

玉珠峰的星空 / starry night of YuzhuImage by livepine via Flickr
I think... I dream... I sleep beneath dark skies. I see a motion picture show behind closed eyes. The sliver of moon, a beacon of light, a pathway for my flight.

A vast space of twinkling stars, calling my name, inviting me to dance. Surrounding me with romance.

Free from weight... a temporary abode, I take my leave.  My soul will fly to play in the midnight sky.


Missing you

It's been too long since I've looked upon your face, but not long enough to forget.
 Memories of you remain rooted within, secretly nurturing my heart.


Pretty Stove

Lane colored the stove door with green crayon. When I asked him why he did it... he pointed at the stove and said "Pretty". I guess it does liven up a rather boring looking appliance!


Name change

I'm thinking about changing the name of my blog so don't be surprised when it happens. Got any ideas? I could sure use some!

Mothers Love

my wild river’s caught the sun… !!! / ma riviè...Image by Denis Collette...!!! via Flickr

Mothers Love

To love so completely, beautifully as
the morning sky.
Twinkling stars surrounded by
lavender light.
Natural as the rippling waters of a river
flowing steadily into the future.
Ever changing as the
Living and breathing so another
may do the same.
Mind and soul connected as the sun and moon
to the earth... unpenitratable.
Feelings that time will never diminish;
lingering like morning dew upon flowers.
Blooming ever larger year by year.

Enhanced by Zemanta
Making a decision may seem obvious to some, but blinding to another... life makes these things difficult for a reason. There is something to be learned from hardship.

Your loss...

Dear _____,

How could you know what you've given up when you never gave them a chance. Beautiful little souls, innocent and free. Given the chance... they will change your life; change the way you perceive the world.

Too bad you have let your pride and stupidity push people out of your life. It's your loss! We will get on just fine without you, we already have.

The Dampier Family


State of mind...

What is it that can cause a person to be hateful... Is it the lack of confidence in themselves? What could make one person be so cruel to another that they cause them to break down? Who do these people think they are to be treating another human being with so much disrespect? I'm not a violent person, but I do believe some people seriously need to be bitch slapped!

We are all human beings... body, mind, and soul. We come equipped with a brain and emotions. USE THEM PEOPLE!!


Update on our foster pups

 I wanted to give an update on our puppies. The goal we set out to accomplish has been a huge success and is now coming to an end. Only three of our puppies remain (out of 8). One of those three will be going to a new home within the next few days, and another will stay here as the newest member of our family (yes... I caved!). A wonderful group out of Houston, TX called Pupsquad has helped and I can't thank them enough! I don't know if I would have sanely made it through this without them. They have provided us with everything we need to take care of the puppies. They also helped to find homes for them. I also must thank my sister for introducing me to the organization. THANK YOU PUPSQUAD AND STEF!!

 It's amazing to see how these little creatures have altered my family's life...and floor... and walls! They have brought an immense amount of joy to us. We have all learned so much about the cycle of life, how to care for them, and falling hard in love... especially my boys. If given the chance, I would do this all over again. Preferably with a larger house though!

For more information on fostering or adopting a dog/cat:


Happy Blah Blah Blah

 My 29th birthday is fast approaching and I don't find myself excited at all. I'm past looking forward to my birthday, now I dread that another year is gone and I'm a whole year older. There is still so much I want to accomplish, but I feel like I'm running out of time.  So close to the big 3 0! 

 I've found that many of my friends have stopped remembering their birthdays after years 25-30 and will forever stay 25-30. (Thanks to Hollywood) I don't want to feel that way. I want to embrace getting older and enjoy my birthdays. I want to look forward to the years ahead and what they will bring. I keep telling myself that with age comes knowledge and experience, but so far it's not working. How do I overcome this worry that has plagued woman for so many years?


Joe Stampley & The Uniques Golden Hits 01 All These Things

My all time favorite song... All these things by The Uniques. Beautifully sung, just an amazing love song!


Listen up...

Grab your little one's and squeeze them tight... never let go. Cover their little faces with kisses, dirt and all. Play with them, talk with them, listen to their stories. Cherish every word, every milestone. Remember those tiny hand prints all over the wall, they won't last forever. Knick knacks can be replaced, floors can be cleaned, stains can be removed, but nothing can replace a child. Look at children for what they are... gifts from god, miracles, little angels. Love them with every fiber of your being, and then some. Step up to the challenges they present, teach them the ways of the world. Appreciate all that they have taught you. Most importantly, look into their eyes every chance you get and say, "I love you". Don't ever let go without a fight. Thank god every single day that they are in your life.  All too often, these angels are taken away...
Heidi... I pray to your beautiful baby boy and for your broken heart.
Angie... I pray for your sweet little niece and a miraculous recovery.

I wish I could make everything alright.


Needing a home...

I would like you to meet the new (temporary) members of our family...

This is Minnie and her 8 puppies. Minnie is my foster dog. She is an American Staffordshire (excuse the spelling!). She came to us pregnant and hungry recently when my neighbor abandoned her. She is the absolute sweetest thing, but we have had a heck of a time finding her a home. No one wanted a pregnant dog. Our only choice was to keep her, then try again after the puppies were born. Throwing her back out on the street is not an option for me. Sending her to a shelter where they will put her to sleep is not an option for me. Minnie deserves a chance with a wonderful family. Her puppies deserve a chance to live.

Minnie gave birth to her puppies 4 days ago. I really have to thank my friend Jemi for being on hand to help me. Minnie had a tough time in the beginning, but Jemi was able to help her through the labor. It was fascinating to watch these little bitty balls of spotted fur being born and the motherly instincts that instantly took over as Minnie cleaned and cared for every single puppy. I have a new appreciation for what a dog has to go through!                                                        
The puppies are growing larger day by day. Their eyes should be opening any time now to gaze upon a strange world. Their day consists of eating and sleeping just like a newborn infant, and just like a new mother... Minnie stays by her little ones' side tending to their every whimper. Oh man do they whimper!!
All three boys (hubby included) has officially fallen in love with  every puppy. I might be a tad bit fond of them too! hehe Each puppy is so different than another,but they all have the ability to capture your heart. Ask me again how I feel about them when they are older and taking over my house! It definitely will be hard to give them up once we have found them a home... and I intend on finding a home for every single one.
Both of my boys have really gained a lot from this experience. William can now tell you whatever you need to know about a puppies eating and sleeping habits. Lane is learning how to be gentle and have patience. However... I'm already getting bombarded with "can we keep one mommy? Please, please, please?"


Only being honest...

  Yesterday, my little family and I went on our weekly shopping trip to Wal-Mart. The trip started out great with both the boys in very non-whiney or "I want this, this and got to have that" moods. Right when I thought we were going to be able to check out and exit the store without any issues... William gets ants in his pants and begins running around. We give him his warning which includes him settling down or his beloved bubbles are staying at the store. The warning goes unheaded so daddy puts the beloved bubbles back on the shelf just as promised. Well, this doesn't make for a happy William.  He begins begging in a very loud voice as tears stream down his cheeks. Me, being the push-over I am, sits beside William on the bench next to the pharmacy. I begin my spill about bad decision making and we discuss how we are suppose to act in a store. William told me he understood what he did wrong and then apologized for his behavior. After hugs and kisses where given I grab the bubbles off the shelf. Before I handed the bottle back, I asked William... "Are you going to be a big boy and listen so we can purhase your bubbles and go home?" He promptly replies... "I certainly hope so mommy. I want to blow my bubbles." *sigh* At least he was honest!


Ten years...

  Ten years... ten years have gone by since I have graduated from High School. This little fact was made known to me when I checked the mail yesterday. It came in the form of a gold and maroon postcard with a picture of the graduating class of 2000 stamped right on front. On the opposite side was a note written in italics explaining that it has been ten years since our graduation. A class reunion has been scheduled for May.The note also commanded that I must RSVP at once because everyone is waiting to see me and I didn't want to miss it. Well, I'll be damned if this little postcard will tell me what to do!
  I'm not exactly where I thought I would be at this stage in my life. I haven't accomplished much except for spitting out a couple kids and gaining a hundred pounds. I never graduated from a nice college or held a job worth bragging about. I'm a frumpy stay-at-home mom who's major decisions consist of which room to clean that day or if I feel like cleaning at all! I don't have many friends (only a couple from High School) and no social life at all! I'm addicted to facebook and my t.v. shows that I watch religously. I live in a dumpy trailer falling apart around us and I drive a granny car. Now... don't get me wrong! I'm not unhappy about my life. I just thought I would have more under my belt.
  After analyzing the picture and reading the note a half dozen times, I chunk it in the trash. I'm not going. That's all there is to it! I really don't feel the need to see anyone from High School and tell them about my crazy/boring life. I don't want to hear about their wonderful jobs, wild social lives, and all the weight they lost! I understand this won't be true for everyone there. I understand I'm probably not the only one who's life has gone in this direction, but I'm not ready to face these people. I'm not ready to show them who I am because... at this point, I don't even really know who I am.
  So, that settles it. Much to the postcard and my husbands disappointment... I'm skipping the ten year reunion!

When you just say no...

   I'm the type of person who will do whatever I can to help another person in need, always have and always will. Complete strangers, nieghbors, friends and family can count on me to be there for them. My earliest memory of helping a complete stranger was when I was about 7 or 8yrs old. My dad and I went to Wal-Mart on a particulary hot day in the middle of summer. We parked close by a rusted, beat up truck with a family of four sitting in the bed. A father, a mother, and two twin babies. They looked exhausted, hot and dirty. I noticed a sign laying flat in the bed of the truck close to where the family was sitting. It read "Homeless and Hungry. Please help". I felt my emotions tugging at me and immediatly went to work on my dad to convince him to help. (I didn't have any money my self being so young) It took a lot of pleading and me taking nothing under a $5.00 bill, but he eventually handed over a $10. I walked over to the family quickly, said hello and handed them the money. Before they could speak, I was running back to where my dad was standing. As I was running, I heard the mother say "Thank you and bless you"
   I guess you can say I'm what they call a humanitirian. I see someone suffering and at once... their suffering becomes mine. I feel the heaviness on my heart the same way they feel it in theirs. I can't always help financially, but I can help emotionally and physically.  Occasionally though, I will meet someone who realizes this characteristic in me and will take advantage of it. That's when you have to just say no... no matter how much it bothers you to do so. If I don't walk away the instant I realize I'm being taken advantage of... I will become overwhelmed and bombarded with requests. Nothing I do will ever be enough. My neighbor is one of these people. She has recently fallen on hard times (most of it is her significant others doing) and has to move. I told her Aaron and I will do what we can to help. Since then, she has become super needy and asks for our help with the simplest things. Changing lightbulbs, switching her clothes from the washer to dryer, getting gas for her from the gas station. We let her use our trash barrel because we have the room to spare and she can't afford to pay trash. We've cut her grass, taken care of her dog, and picked up boxes to help her move. We've gathered newspapers when we could and I even spent a few hours helping her pack one day (I did the majority of the work). We've done all these things withen the last couple months and yet she asks for more. Now, I need to explain that she does have a few physical limitations due to a horrible car accident she was in about a year ago, but I have to say that she is physically able to do all the things we have done  for her. Her latest request is for me to pack her whole entire house by myself. What the hell?!! Not only does she want me to pack her whole entire house, she wants us to get more boxes and buy newspapers to pack with! When she sprang this request on me... I decided it was time to walk away.
  As I mentioned before, I would do anything in my power to help someone in need. My emotions take over and it's hard for me to say no. When I do have to walk away... I feel guilt knowing I was all they had. Life goes on and so do I. These certain people will not stop me from helping others, they will not effect the way I see people in need. You never know... I could be the one in need and I would certainly wish for someone like me to be around.


* The lady mentioned above doesn't read my blog, so I felt free to write this.

Always changing

Change is good... especially for the better. I like change. I embrace it. You may have noticed that I've changed and rearranged my blog several times since I started it so many months ago. I'm always looking to improve (not perfect). I think I have come a long way from where I began. I would like you to tell me what you think... you are the reader. I am always interested in hearing any and all opinions you may have... good and bad!

I've hit a bit of a brick wall with my writing. Not enough drama to stir up my emotions I guess! Don't worry... somethings bound to happen soon.


Poem: Signs of Spring


Signs of Spring

Shadows dancing beyond windowshades.
Sunlight flickering upon the floor.
The afternoon heat invades the room.
The breeze gently blows outside the door.
Sweet floral smells fill the air.
Upon the trees flower buds bloom.
Bees softly buzzing everywhere.
Mother Nature is whispering, "Springs' coming soon"
A symphony of sorts can be heard all around;
From birds upon the branches to leaves rustling in the wind.
Plant your bare feet on top of the ground;
Watch the miracles begin.


* Picture of a tree in full bloom located in my yard.

Poem: Release


Drumming heart
Blood rushing in my ears
Breath in, breath out
So many questions
Such a small amount of time
One opportunity to get it right
Flickering sunlight
Hum of the airconditioner
Breath in, breath out


*Writing is a form of release for me.

Sex Ed (The First Encounter)

We have a couple dogs who roam the neighborhood. They are not strays, but they keep escaping from the yard where they live. One is female, the other is male. Well, the female dog loves to visit our house and play with the boys. A few days ago, she was laying on our front porch waiting for the boys to go outside. The male dog apparently joined her on our porch... all of a sudden I hear William  hollering for us to come to the door, "Oh no momma... the dogs. Come here! Hurry!". I can tell by his voice that he was concerned, but more curious than anything. I quickly walked over to William and saw the two dogs humping right there in front of our screened door. "What are we going to do momma? Are they playing?" I opened the door to make them quit and leave, but I guess I startled them because they got stuck together! William was very curious and asked a ton of questions. "What are they doing Momma? Why are they doing that? Are they fighting or playing?" I replied "They're playing" and left it at that. Both the boys were fascinated by what they were seeing. We closed the front door so the dogs could untangle themselves without the boys being able to see anything, but it was a fight to keep them away from the windows. The male dog drug the female around our front yard in front of the window until they were able to work their way loose. This was the topic of our conversations for the rest of the day! I know I left William hanging with my explanation and I might have had to endure less questioning, but I wasn't prepared to explain it to him just yet. I still have plenty of time for that and I'm sure oppurtunities will present themselves!


Poem: Cardinal


A rare winters' day brings forth a gift.
Brilliant red among grey falling snow perches upon a branch
A flighty body of delicate feathers shaking off shining droplets of ice.
Stopping just a moment so the world may glimpse a thing of beauty.
A simple reminder to seek a silver lining.


My Quote of the day....

Being a responsible adult is to decide against things you really want because you know it's just not time. It's to make these decisions based on knowledge and research.  To fully understand the consequences of the decision and how the outcome will affect you. Your heart calls for something; yet you walk away and never look back. Being a responsible adult really sucks!


In the wrong......

 Pettiness serves no purpose, it only breeds negativity and other such unflattering characteristics. It should hold no place in the human heart. It should not be allowed to seep into the soul. Once let in, it becomes a disease; branching throughout to wreak havoc with the mind. We as a people are above this, at least we should be. Juvenile actions and words lead us down an empty, lonely path of sadness. Turning and twisting emotions into a state of entitlement, then desperation. Show no sympathy, no pity for a childish act. It's not deserved.

 When an emotion or action feels wrong, it usually is wrong. The only way to redeem yourself is by replacing pride and anger with heartfelt honesty. Honesty is a quality everyone appreciates.

No one is -or ever will- be perfect, but we don't have to be monsters.


*Just another vent!


I do believe in miracles, I do believe in miracles. I see them everyday. Everytime I look in my little boys faces. Everytime I look around me. I do believe in miracles. You have to look close, you have to believe. I see them in strangers faces, in my family, I see them in nature. All around the world, every religion, every race. We are all joined together by one god. We are all loved by a god. We all take things for granted, we all lose our way, but I do believe in miracles. I know I will see one soon.


* I'm not sure why I had to write this, I just felt the need to say it.

Poem: Guardian


Closing my eyes amongst the twilight, then upon an angels wings I rest.
Guardianship of humanity, devoted to love, protector of life.
A vulnerable soul shielded brilliantly within feathers, moving as one toward starry heavens.
Dreams unravel as jointly we orbit a majestic moon, subconscious thoughts spread through vast space.
Comforted by the radiance and humming of a psalm eminating from the holy being.
Guarded from malice, defended against negativity, glistening with the white light.
Amidst rolling grey clouds we surge alongside shooting stars; spiraling toward a familiar home.
Descending into consciousness once again as the sun adorns the sky, I open my eyes.


Back Online

I'm finally back online! I was having a few internet issues the past few weeks, but they have all been resolved. I'm ready to start posting again. I have really missed this blog!


Not a clue.....

I've entered a confusing time in my life. I have so many unanswered questions rolling around in my head. Struggling for so long has completely worn me out and I'm not sure how to close the hole that is beginning to form. It seems like I have so many options, but when you take a closer look..... it's only a show. There are different paths stretched out before me, but I am frozen in place. I know I must do something; I can't go on this way. I just have a feeling that I am missing something and when I find it, everything will come together. How do I find the missing piece? Which path should I take? I know...I have to answere these questions myself since I'm the only one who knows what the hell I'm talking about. Well, that's not entirely true.....I'm not sure either. Forgive me if my words are coming out jumbled, but they have not wanted to come out sounding sensible for some time now. A bit of writers block maybe? Or do I have so many thoughts that I don't know where to begin? Could be a little bit of both. Anyway, not to worry......I'm a big girl who will figure it out eventually.


Good Momma Part 2

   I am very proud to announce today that I have been promoted from "good momma" to "the goodest momma in the whole world"! I accept this honor with pride knowing now that I have fully earned it.
  You see.... since my last post on this subject, I have done a little experiment. I was interested in knowing what exactly made me a good momma. Was it giving in to him or did he truly think I was doing a good job? My plan was to take a mental note of what was happening at the moment of the compliment. I took my time observing. I noted each compliment carefully in my head. After awhile, I noticed a pattern. I recieved the most compliments from William when I gave in to whatever it was that he wanted. Only a small percent came out of nowhere. Well, right before I came to the conclusion that I had a con artist on my hands......it happened. 
   Today has been a very trying day for us. Being cooped up inside due to the freakishly cold weather has caused William and his brother to act up a bit more than normal. It's been the usual sibling fights caused by "the wants because he has its" or "the he's touching me so I'm pushing hims". Point being that both have gotten in trouble a bit more today than normal.  William especially has spent many, many, many long minutes in time out today. After a particularly bad episode of  "I don't want to sit in time out anymore" and  "Everytime you get out of time out I'm going to add more minutes" which included a lot of tears (his tears, not mine), we sat down to talk.  We always have the talk after both of us have calmed down. The talk consists of explaining the wrong choices he made and what we can do next time instead. Well, once our talk was over and we were giving hugs and kisses, he said "Your the goodest momma in the whole wide world". I instantly teared up and gave him another big ole' squeeze, then I said " Thank you William. I love you very much."
  So you see......I've obviously done something right. I can accept my promotion with the joy only a mother can have. The joy of knowing that your child truly appreciates you. If I could only get his father to do the same, I'd be set! Now, I'm just wondering if there will be another promotion in the future for me or..... "shutter" will I be demoted when he hits preteen? Yikes! I won't think about that just yet (too scary). I'm gonna bask in the beautiful compliments of my children and wear my badge proudly.

Excuse me while I vent.......

I'm searching my soul to find the strength I need to carry on with this day. A smile will be on display upon my face. I will not let negativity seep into my mind. I will not let you turn me into what you want me to be. I will beat you in your own game and take back my happiness. I am a woman with surviving on her mind. I will find the sun when you send me a rain cloud. I will find the positive when you send me crap. I am determined to make this life mine. I have the power and god on my side. I will kick some negative ass!

Thank you all for letting me have a crazy moment. I'm done now, I promise!


My Links

These are a few of my favorite websites to visit.....

Poetry related.....

  • The Academy of American Poets
  • Poetry.org


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Here's how to contact me....

If you have any questions or comments I would love to hear them!

You can contact me at amdampier76@yahoo.com

I'm also on facebook:

Dana Dampier

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