Imprisoned


Photo credit: markmiller from morguefile.com



You trapped me in your web
Lured me with your lies
Imprisoned within the world
You spun
While spitting in my eyes
Words burning like venom
Eating at my heart
Until only a shell remains
Crumbling and marred

Dana



~ Written for Open Link Night @dVerse
Please leave me your thoughts below!


20 comments:

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    1. Thanks Laura for stopping by to read. I really appreciate it!

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  2. I specially like:

    Words burning like venom
    Eating at my heart

    Sometimes when things don't go well, it might be better to let go and start over ~

    Merry Christmas ~

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    1. Very good advice Grace... it will be taken! Thank you for coming by to read.

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  3. A lot of emotion and sadness in this piece but it was translated so well with your choice of words. Merry Christmas!!

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    1. Thank you Kimolisa! I try very hard to do just that. I appreciate you coming by to read!

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  4. ugh, pain and emotion in this one...betrayal...one of the darkest things...the death of the heart, one of the saddest...

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    1. I do believe this is probably one of the saddest I've wrote... but I've already wrote a few that are on the lighter, happier side of things. I'm hoping with some changes... they will stay that way. Thank you Brian.

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  5. The pic is great, the words are greater. Sad, emotional, forceful.

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    1. Thank you! I love the pic as well. I appreciate you stopping by to read!

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  6. Powerful and well-expressed, Dana!

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    1. Thanks Laurie... I appreciate you reading and commenting!

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  7. This is fantastic. Really an excellent poems. Short poems speak to me much more loudly than longer ones. You can really pack a punch when you focus on just a few hard-hitting lines.

    There's no one who can't identify with this poem; that is key.

    This is my favorite section:
    "Imprisoned within the world
    You spun
    While spitting in my eyes"

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    1. Thank you! I really appreciate your awesome comment. I am thrilled that you liked my poem so much!

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  8. Excellent work, giving an accurate depiction of the difficulty of a toxic relationship. Well done!

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  9. So much is conveyed in this small poem. Exceptional poetry. Nice work. Happy holidays

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  10. This is excellent! I too have been inspired to write of such things. Sharing a link should you care to visit http://insideoutpoetry.blogspot.com/2012/10/caught-in-your-deadlights.html
    Well penned, enjoyed reading this!

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  11. Lots of feelings in this one indeed!! I enjoyed!!

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    1. Thank you Stephen! I really appreciate that!!

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To have great poets... there must be great audiences
~ Walt Whitman

Thank you for being that audience!

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